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Bearcat Thunder has become a staple across campus, and the name will surely be the butt of many jokes and the basis for countless memes. The gigantic, not-so-originally named hand sanitizer bottles are an equally welcome sight.

But if the disinfectant is the thunder, our hand sanitizer is undoubtedly the rain. Or more accurately, the flash flood. Those things release a full-out tsunami at the slightest touch.

With our society’s newfound consciousness of sanitation and social distancing, the days of simply sharing hand sanitizer with a friend when you accidentally dispense too much are long gone. Instead, I’m stuck to deal with a pool of sanitizer splashing out of my hands every time I try to be proactive and hygienic.

I suppose a generous amount is better than a skimpy serving when it comes to, you know, sanitizing. It’s just a little inconvenient when my sleeves come back drenched and there’s a puddle at my feet every time I reach for the sanitizer.

On the bright side, it’ll be good for my water and electric bill. Why shower at home when I can get a quick wash down on the way into class?

Thank you, Northwest, for not only providing hand sanitizer, but hand, forearm, bicep, shoulder sanitizer as well. If you catch me massaging my upper arm on the way into class, it’s not because I’m sore from some intense workout; I’m simply rubbing in an overwhelming amount of hand sanitizer. Never have my elbows been so clean.

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