As college students, it is known that we have little regard for our lives while crossing the street. We all have looked cars in the headlights as we cross, giving drivers little to no time to slow, repeating the mantra in our heads, “Hit me, hit me, please, this tution needs to be paid.” as we walk into the line of death, without fear. While I am one to brazenly step into the street in light of oncoming cars, I refuse to be mowed down on the sidewalk by a bicycle or a skateboard or a Razor scooter made for 8-year-olds.


We get it bicycle riders, you have a bike that is relatively faster than my little 5’1’’ legs, but I will not stand for you zipping past me, weaving in and out of the small gaps of people on the sidewalks. As I walk alone, the sound of the thin tires scuffing pass from behind me, sending my heart into panic as I realize I was seconds away from inching to the left, directly into your reckless path. Sometimes, I wonder what would happen if I kick the side of the wheel ever so lightly as you past, nearly taking my shoulder off. Maybe you’ll learn then.

The skateboards aren’t so bad, except the thruming sound of the wheel flying over the cracks in the sidewalks. I wonder if everyone else on the sidewalk can hear you coming, too. I look back often because I honestly don’t trust the skateboarders’ judgment to not run me over. I secretly love the silent frustration when the sidewalk is too congested and the skateboarder is forced to walk like the rest of us. I find it even funnier when the legs of the rider aren’t strong enough to make it up a hill, mainly because I know I’d never make it either.


The razor scooters are the most surprising of all. The sight of fully grown adults, sifting through the sidewalks, backs hunched over the four foot toy, is truly a knee slapper. By the end of the year, I’m sure that one leg pushing off the sidewalk is twice as big as the other. And their ankles must have grown immune to the many times that little scooter has swung around and crushed them. Their calf muscles are uneven and lopsided; it is worth the body aches and broken ankles to get to class 2.5 seconds sooner than everyone else?

Here’s the moral of the story: bicycles are dangerous, skateboards are annoying, scooters are for children and it’s fine to step into traffic and brave the two-ton vehicle going 20 miles per hour; at least you have a chance of getting paid for your suffering.

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